No regrets!
by Asma Dark
Summary: Tominaga Sei was discovered by captain Kondo and vice-captain Hikijata while she was talking with Souji. Kondo decided to punish her by ordering her to commit seppuku. Will this be the end of her bushi life? what will Souji do as he faces his beloved master looking at him as a traitor? A story of determined Sei and Souji to have no regrets in life!


Well hi everyone,

I recently read Kaze Hikaru manga and stopped because there are about 40 volumes, it is so much for me to read all this. I'm satisfied to know that Sei got accepted as a samurai even though she's a girl, she could manage to be strong. I know that there were many samurai girls who were like her, who honorod their lives and served their country. and there also girls in all over the world that are fighting to honor their lives. I like Sei because she's brave so I wanted to write an ending that suit her.

Please pardon my poor English as this is my first time to write a story in English. I hope you enjoy a little of my imagination, and I hope to read your comments and opinions.

Enjoy!

In a rainy day, Kamiya and Soji were trying to take shelter under a tree on their way to the dojo. Standing next to each other, Kamiya said, "This is all because you wanted to eat sweets so suddenly"

\- "well it's not a big deal," replied Soji with a smile on his face, "sweets are always a good cure you know"

\- "huh? Cure for what?" asked Kamiya with a nonchalant face.

Soji got surprised for a second, and then he chuckled saying "aren't girls supposed to like sweets more than men?"

With an angry face this time, Kamiya said, "will you stop reminding me that I am a girl?"

\- "but didn't you say that you want me to see you as a girl sometimes?"

When Kamiya heard what Soji said she blushed, her heart start beating so fast and she wished for him not to look at her. Soji on the other hand was wearing a bashful smile looking to the sky; he knew that if he look at her face, he might want to say more.

\- "Tominaga Sei" said Soji like he was whispering, "I wish people would know someday that there was a girl called Tominaga Sei that was brave enough to be a true bushi. It would be a waste if no one knows"

When Sei tried to stop him from teasing her, a voice suddenly said "is it true?"

Both Sei and Soji turn to confirm that they are not imagining things; it was captain Kondo and vice-captain Hijikata. They heard everything!

Those moments when Soji was facing Kondo Sensei's eyes were the toughest moments in his whole life, he knows everything now, he knows that I deceived him, I betrayed him…

Hijikata asked as if he was hoping it is some misunderstanding, "Speak Soji, is it true? Kamiya is Sei? Kamiya is a real girl?"

Soji hesitated to respond, then he tried to open his mouth when Kondo said "don't you dare lie to me Soji, don't disrespect me more than you already did"

His voice was cold, he was mad indeed, but there was something more behind those dead eyes of his, he was disappointed in the man he raised.

Soji got shaken when he heard Kondo's words, he knew that he can't do anything, it is over. Sei looked at Soji's face to understand that he decided to confess about everything.

Soji, while lowering his head, said, "Yes, Kamiya is a girl"

And before they catch that horrible reality, Sei said "I'm sorry I deceived you all, it is my fault and my responsibility, so please, grant me my last wish and punish me as a bushi, please order me to commit seppuku Kondo Sensei"

Soji looked at Sei but he couldn't see her face, she was lowering her head waiting for a response from Kondo. Her words were not shaken, she wasn't afraid, she faced her fate as a true samurai.

Hijikata's face was surprised, he didn't know what to do or what to say. Kondo looked at Sei and said without hesitation "of course I will"

Both Soji and Hijikata panicked when they heard Kondo's words, and when Soji tried to speak, Kondo looked at him and said "quiet"

His cold voice made Soji enable to say anything, and then Kondo said "follow me both of you"

They all went to Kondo's room while he asked Saitou to keep everyone away.

Soji and Sei sat before Kondo and Hijikata silent, until Kondo said, "explain Soji, why there is a girl in your unit?"

Soji, lowering his head, said, "it was true that Kamiya joined to revenge her father and brother. I knew from the very beginning that she's a girl, but kept silent until she fulfil her wish. I thought that she will quit after that, but she came back and decided that she wants to live as a bushi. I was weak against her will, so all I could do is help her be stronger"

\- "you knew that you were betraying us and yet you kept silent?"

Soji, with a determined face, said, "I never betrayed you or the shinsengumi. I didn't find Kamiya's being between us a threat to the troop, that's why I accepted her"

Kondo looked at Sei and said "so Kamiya or Sei, you won't beg for your life?"

\- "I understand that I deceived the troop so I will accept your punishment Kondo Sensei, I intend to die as a samurai"

Sei's voice was calm, she was prepared for this day.

Soji said suddenly "I'll also be honored if you punish me too Kondo Sensei, Kamiya was my responsibility so I'll end my life alongside her"

\- "you can't Okita Sensei, it was my decision to stay…"

\- "behave!"

One word from Soji and Kamiya fell silent; his sharp voice told her not to interfere in anything he say.

Hijikata kept silent, while Kondo said, "I'll decide your punishment today, leave for now"

When Soji and Kamiya left the room, Saitou entered and said "then punish me too Kondo Sensei, I also knew recently that Kamiya is a girl, but I couldn't report that, she was desperate to stay so…"

Suddenly Hijikata punched Saitou and said "so you lied to me that day to keep them together, just what happened to you and Soji? you got charmed by that girl…"

Hijikata felt some pain in his chest, he knows that it's not that they did that because Kamiya is girl, they helped her because she's a samurai, a strong one that he himself acknowledge.

Kondo said, without commenting on the fact that Saitou knew about it "Saitou, go after them and see what they are up to, I want you to listen to their words and report to me"

Soji and Sei went far from the dojo, they sat under a tree silently. The rain has stopped and the sky has cleared.

Soji, while resting his head on Sei's shoulder, said, "so if Kondo Sensei decided to spare our lives and kick you out of the troop, what will you do?"

\- "I'll end my life of course"

Soji's surprised at her words lift his head and turned to face her saying, "you really are something"

Sei's face looked tired, but it was still beautiful in Soji's eyes that his heart was racing.

After a moment of silence, Soji said while blushing "what if… what if I marry you?"

Sei blushed as well and said with tears in her eyes "please don't say it like that to me, I can't do it, I can only be by your side as a man, I'm not good as a wife, I'm sorry"

Soji smiled and pated Sei's head and said "I expected this answer, you don't have to be sorry. In fact me too, all I want is for you is to be by my side as a man, I guess we both have odd minds"

Sei, while still wiping her tears, said, "if Kondo Sensei kick me out of the troop, what will you do?"

\- "I will follow you of course, I'll end my life"

Sei got surprised and tried to beg him not to do it, but when she lift her head and faced him she knew it's useless, he made up his mind.

\- "then, I want you at least to apologize to Kondo Sensei, tell him that you didn't betray him, I want us to pass with no regrets, please Okita Sensei"

Sei's tears didn't stop while she was talking. Soji reached his hand and wiped her tears saying "Indeed, I can't go without apologizing to him"

Sei suddenly grabbed his hand and said with a pain "It's because of me that Kondo Sensei's mad at you, I'm sorry that I ruined you relationship with him, I'm sorry that I ruined your life, if you never met me…"

Soji hugged Sei and said with a warm voice "don't be ridiculous, plus it was my fault that we were discovered. You were the light of my life; I don't regret anything, not for accepting you and not for loving you. It is our fate to end up like this, so let's face it with a smile"

Suddenly Soji remembered something so he said, "oh we have patrol now right? We need to get going. We're still on duty until the decision is made"

They both were laughing and talking about other things like nothing happened, they both looked so strong. Saitou saw everything and heard everything, so he went back to report to Kondo as he was ordered.

When Kondo knew their conversation from Saito, has sighed and said, "well they are demons, so I'll let them die with honor"

Saitou was ordered to leave and summon both Soji and Kamiya. Hijikata was wearing a weird face, he was in pain. Kondo noticed that Hijikata doesn't want this end, but he can't oppose his captain. So they both kept silent waiting for Soji and Sei.

When they arrived and heard Kondo's decision, they accepted it with a smile. Sei said while looking at Kondo as she was saying goodbye "thank you so much for granting my wish, I'm honored to get to meet you and serve under you Kondo Sensei"

She then faced Hijikata and said, "I'm also honored to get to serve under you Hijikata Sensei, I learned a lot from both of you"

Hijikata couldn't say anything, he felt weak, and he felt that he shouldn't let Kondo know about his feeling.

Before they leave, Soji also made up his mind and said "Kondo sensei, I'm sorry, I let you down. But I swear that I never betrayed you, I swear that I served you and only you my whole life. For Sei, she was exactly as me or Hijikata to you, she was my favorite pupil that I raised myself, she was another demon raised by a demon. I was so proud of her that I didn't want her to quit the troop, I wanted her to be strong, I wanted to see her as a samurai before my eyes"

After Soji and Sei left Kondo's room, they looked to each other smiling, then Sei raised her fist and said "no regrets?"

While Soji also raised his fist and put her against Sei's and said "no regrets"

Tomorrow is the day, Kondo said that he will make all the first unit men as witnesses of their ending beside Saitou who knows everything, he said that the first unit deserves to know the truth about Kamiya, so they accept the punishment he gave to her and Soji.

When the day waited comes, the first unit gathered at the dojo while the others kept away by Kondo's orders. Hijikata explained to them everything and the shock was more than they could get. They were speechless when Soji and Sei where on the ground preparing to kill their selves.

They were both quite; they did not look shaken nor afraid. They were ready to die.

Soji asked Saitou to be his assistant, but he refused. Saitou was also in pain, but he couldn't do anything. Harada and another man were chosen to be assistants for Soji and Kamiya.

Soji took of his kimono to insert the blade right in his stomach, and when Sei wanted to do the same, everyone panicked and Hijikata asked her no to do it, but she did not listen.

When she took off her kimono, her tiny body was bandaged. There was many scars on her body. Everyone in the room felt horrible seeing Kamiya like that, but Soji didn't even flinch, he closed his eyes feeling proud that she's calm. She's really not normal, just like him.

Saitou turned his face not wanting to see, while Hijikata was biting his lips very hard. Suddenly Harada drooped his sword and fell to the ground facing Kondo and said "please Kondo Sensei, can't you overlook this? Kamiya is a true samurai so why ending up like this?"

Before Kondo say anything Saitou also fell to the ground begging, when all the men of the first unit did the same, they all begged Kondo to spare Soji and Kamiya's lives. In the end, Hijikata also did the same; he couldn't endure it any longer. He said while facing his master "I know I shouldn't be doing this, but I beg you to reconsider your punishment, Kamiya is one of our strongest men, she is loyal and smart enough to gain our respect, I don't care if she's a girl, she's a true bushi and she proved it many times"

Soji and Sei were speechless, they didn't expect for all these men to beg for their lives, it was a moment of honor indeed.

Kondo looked at Hijikata and said "Toushi, raise your head"

When Hijikata lift his head, he saw Kondo smiling. He didn't understand what's in the head of Kondo until he said "raise your heads everyone"

When they all looked at Kondo they kind of get it, it was a test. After a moment of silence, Kondo said, "I expected that you will protect those two, but I had to go this far to see for myself. I also don't care if Kamiya is a girl, she is a man and she proved it to all of us. But if I kept silent about it, then I'll be deceiving my men, and if I asked you to accept Kamiya, you'll take it as an order even if you don't accept it. But now seeing you all begging for Kamiya's life, I can say for sure that I forgive both Kamiya and Soji for lying; now we can all hold that little secret together, don't you think?"

Indeed the first unit was special because they were so close with Sei and with their captain Soji. So instead of discovering it someday, it is better for them to know that secret and accept it earlier.

Sei and Soji were still looking into the space as if they didn't understand what happened. The first unit all screamed for Kondo Sensei, then Harada hugged Sei saying, "come on stand up, you're safe now"

He remembered that Sei is half-naked so he put her kimono back when the others came and they all hugged her.

Kondo went to Soji and hugged him. While Hijikata watched with a big smile on his face. Soji felt like crying, but he couldn't, he was so glad that Sei is safe, he was so glad the he's between the arms of his master, he was so glad that he can still live.

When Kondo let go of his, he said, "I'm proud of you Soji"

Kondo then turned to Sei, as everyone was watching. When she saw him, she tried to lower her head but he put his hand on her shoulder saying, "you don't have to, we all acknowledge you as a samurai, you have my full respect young girl"

Sei couldn't stop her tears, while Kondo wiped them saying "I wonder how can someone be so delicate as you yet so strong and determined, you're a mystery indeed"

\- "well she was raised by a not normal man so it's only natural" Hijikata said and then patted Sei on the head while saying, "you should be proud of yourself"

\- "I'm the one who's proud of you" it was Soji's voice.

Sei looked at his eyes while he said, "you worked hard to get all these men lower their heads and beg for you to stay here, I'm really proud of you"

Suddenly Saitou stood beside Sei and grabbed her shoulder saying, "you're indeed a true samurai"

Then he pushed her towards Soji. Sei was still trying to get a hold of her tears when Hijikata said with a smile "come on Soji, you can hug her at least"

Soji was confused while he saw her; he was afraid of touching her or saying anything to her. He didn't want others to see her as a girl. When he heard Hijikata's words, he smiled and hugged her without saying anything. Sei managed to calm herself so she got away from Soji's arms and said "thank you all, Kondo Sensei, Hijikata Sensei, Okita Sensei, Saito Sensei and all of you, I'll do my best to live as a samurai until my last breath, I'll hold your respect in my heart and live with it"

Everyone was happy for the way things ended. Sei suddenly hugged Soji again and said, "I'm glad you're safe Okita Sensei, could you grant me a small wish"

Soji blushed while everyone understood that he's in love with her.

Suddenly Hijikata said to Soji "I don't get it, if you love her this much why not just marry her?"

Soji trembled and said "don't say it out load Hijikata san, plus…"

Soji hesitated a little looking at Sei then said, "I'll show you, it is better than explaining"

Then he looked at Sei and asked, "so what's the wish you want me to grant for you?"

Sei said with a blushing face "a match, I really feel the need to sweat a little so please train with me Okita Sensei"

Everyone left speechless after what she said, even Hijikata, then Soji smiled and said, "see? can I marry someone with a mind like this?"

Sei got mad and punched Soji saying, "shut up, it's not like your mind is any better than mine"

While voice of laughter filled the dojo, it was laughter filled of happiness and hope.


End file.
